Funny Get Well Poems

Need some funny get well poems? Here's one for those in the hospital:

I hear that you're under the weather.
They've probed regions upper and nether
When they ask you to strip
Keep a stiff-upper lip
Tell those stories when we get together.

Funny Get Well Poems commiserate the human condition. We can even find some humor (we have to search hard!) in a knee-replacement.

In offices, clubs, and pubs across this great land, there has developed the highly civilized tradition of passing about a greeting card upon which caring friends will scrawl encouragements to someone who is ill. The most civilized person in that group will have put themselves out to purchase the card, address it, and pass it about. We who are always mildly surprised at our own failure to think of it salute you.

When such a card lands in one’s lap, the brain often stalls, becoming, in fact a veritable tabula rasa, as John Locke once said, though possibly not within this context. As you sit there with pen poised, all eyes upon you to hurry up and pass it on, we feel your pain. While Edward seems to have drawn a blank, a situation common for him under duress, Kathleen can help you out with a little help for those awkward moments. Nor are producing funny get well poems the only uncomfortable moments of the human condition.

Hernia

There was a man from Serbska Sernia
Who developed a most hurtful hernia
Defied Workers' Comp,
Danger his wont
That's what lifting those boxes will earn 'ya.

Too Long In the Reading Room?

Your subscription to that periodical
Which you read with devotion methodical
In the bathroom, tabloids
Can cause hemorrhoids
Let us hope that they’re not episodical.

Challenge: Get Well Soon

Your Boss Does Not Believe You Are Sick

You're in bed with a general ague?
With coughing and fever to plague you?
Should your boss point a finger
And say you malinger
Sneeze on him(OR her) for the moxie to peg you.

Does Not Believe You Are Sick

You're in bed with a general ague?
With coughing and fever to plague you?
Should your coach point a finger
And say you malinger
Sneeze on him(OR her) for the moxie to peg you.