Seek the Gentle Humor of a Limerick Poem
Whilst You Should Actually Be Working

Ah, the sublime limerick poem! Edward expresses some trepidation at offering these scraps of doggerel, lamely admitting that the limericks are not haute culture. These regard the various professions and occupations, associates with whom he must alternate on those days when he is not in the pub (admittedly, those are few). The limerick poem is particularly adept at skewering those who share an office. Should you be looking specifically for free poems about bosses, step this way and listen to the roasting.

Kathleen, however, by nature and temperament quite irreverent, saw no harm in a bit of amusement at their expense, pointing out that all groups were even-handedly lambasted. Possibly more limerick poems will follow, should the general public suggest that this vocation or that avocation should be properly included. Speaking of which, how about those of a rocket scientist or brain surgeon?

Limerick Poem for Art Teachers

Science teachers have budget rates scaler
Yours the dinghy; their funding, the whaler.
For you who teach art
Are pushing a cart
Or you're the one stuck in the trailer.

If you're not brushing well, there's the threat
A cavity starts, and more yet,
If you don't care a fig
That hole will get big,
And a root canal is what you'll get.

And after destroying that nerve
There's the function you'll want to preserve.
Then he'll say with a frown
That the tooth needs a crown
Which is nothing less than you deserve.

"I see that you're partial to coffee
Or is it red wine that you quaff? We
Can fix that with bleach
And bright lights that leach
The stains that are not coming off, see?"

"You're not flossing well, I think. Please
See this surgeon for his expertise.
Some chronic detritus
Has caused gingivitis,
A periodontal disease.

“Don't eat sweets, brush your teeth, and floss more.”
All behaviors that dentists adore.
If we did what they say
Would we need them? No way!
Makes you wonder what dentists are for?

Jurors

The jury said exoneration
Though judges said “incarceration.”
This celebrity crook
Then ghost wrote a book
As a fictional pasteurization.

Judges

The mistake was an estate intestate
His property shunted to probate.
His will he had hid
For he favored his Id
Giving stocks, house, and cars to his playmate.

Lawyers

Should you find yourself in prosecution
Your attorneys will find resolution.
If the plaintiffs should score
From your guts and your gore
Hope your net worth is not the solution.

If your property's under a lien
Or the title's bad, meaning unclean
Leave the grief in the lap
Of your lawyer ASAP
Take yourself to realms antipodean.

If your partner is seeking divorce
That's a matter for lawyers, of course
is your ex feeling mean?
is she trying to clean
out your savings and every resource?

For a screw-up that you'll need to thwart
If a civil wrong, that's called a tort
You behaved tortiously
and you harmed property
Or their bodies? They'll see you in court.

A barrister’s pressing exigencies
Had him practicing law with contingencies
His sine qua non?
An old student loan
And its fiscally restricting stringencies.

Pay your bills, make your wills, file tax more.
All behaviors that lawyers adore.
If we did what they say
Would we need them? No way!
Makes you wonder what lawyers are for?

The professional you need isn't included here? Please forgive the oversight. Follow us for your own limerick poem.