For Your Ordination Card Wording

Make your Anniversary Ordination Card a little special with a funny limerick.

Add a little extra something to that ordination gift of a nice dinner out, a personal cash gift, or even a donation for a special project near to his (or her) heart. Bring your pastor a smile for all the blessings he (or she) has brought to you.

Four of the limericks are specifically for the 25 year anniversary to the priesthood or pastorship. The others are for any Christian minister or and military chaplain. You can, in many cases, substitute the year you need in place of "25."

These admittedly specialized poems are provided because of a special request from Shirley.

1

On the first day of your ordination
Did you ever suppose consecration
-More than 9000 days-
Would mean so many strays
Would provide you with such aggravation?

2

Twenty-five years as a priest
In a lifetime of fighting the Beast.
Oh, the patience you've had
When your lambs have been bad
Must have been pretty hard, say the least.

3

All the blessings on us you bestow
You're the very best pastor we know.
In your 25 years
You have dried many tears
And to celebrate that, here's some dough.

4

Your parishioners want you to know
They think highly of you. Even so,
Even God needs a break
So how 'bout a steak
And a really nice glass of merlot?

5

In your Twenty-five years herding cats
And dealing with Church bureaucrats
Oh, the patience you've shown
As you nosed that grindstone
While you wore any number of hats.

6

As a Father to and sinners and brats
Yielding comfort without caveats
No nagging, no fussing
No yelling, no cussing
You're a jewel among all theocrats.