Work Humor Toasts and Roasts Free and Funny

Toast all our workers with some humor. It's a long time until the weekend and you need the laugh.

Work Humor Toasts for Librarian Roast

Describe a librarian's day?
Peaceful and quiet, you say?
There is one thing it lacks
Back there in the stacks
And that thing is more decent pay.

We Love Librarians!

"Look it up for yourself, I abhor
Lazy patrons that come in the door."
Some librarians say
Do we need 'em? No way
Finding books, after all's, what they're for.

Teacher Roast

Be on time, use your mind, study more
All behaviors that teachers adore
If we did what they say
Would we need 'em? No way
Makes you wonder what teachers are for?

Housewife Roast

Please be neat, wipe your feet, and don't snore
All behavior that spouses adore
If you did all they say
Would you need 'em?, no way
Makes you wonder what spouses are for?

Nurse Roast

Leave your beds, take your meds, wash hands more.
All behavior that nurses adore
If you did all they say
Would you need 'em?, no way
Makes you wonder what nurses are for?

Police Roast

Slow it down, don't tailgate, behave more.
All behavior that policemen adore
If you did all they say
Would you need 'em?, no way
Makes you wonder what policemen are for?

Professor Roast

Illigitimi non carborundum
Should they not grant credentials ad eundem
Merely tell them you shan't
Bring your work or your grant
You won't beat 'em? So just under fund them.

Writer Roast

In choosing words, some are verbose
That render their wit adipose
Give me tight-writ precision
For verse of concision
And make every word serve the best prose.

Tutor Roast

Be on time, use your mind, study more
All behaviors that tutors adore
If we did what they say
Would we need 'em? No way
Makes you wonder what tutors are for?

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